“` Everyday Life was adventure, which have created a great wonder and curiosity in me about DEATH. I LOVE DEATH ALWAYS- WHY- I had no answer.
My Life was growing up very fast. When I entered in Nature, I never knew that my life was about to change, I was about to enter in the world of Silence, then Writing and I wrote books like the invisible person.
Everyday Life create something new, learn more about life and universe. so now I have a birds- peacock and many more members- lives with me…
“`I had just fallen in love with a beautiful Nature, when gave me the task to accept my emptiness by my Life. I loved myself too. It was the first time I adulted ‘IN ME’ that my heart actually opened to a Nature and Creation in a very deep and intense way. I was very much in touch with my feelings and I felt so hungry for Nature’s acceptance. I trusted in Life and in God. so…>>>
Nature said I looked good
Life said I never looked so alive
It was like just being born in a new world, or with a new body like these Buds. I FELT that I am flowering.
Accepting my Emptiness is a state of fullness, a state of grace, the flowering of selfless love…
= The womb of stilled and deep Silence, in which the glimpse of sound takes place
= The stilled i-ness in deep silence creates the feeling, in which I-ness disappears and the infinite sound plays the veena
= The soft breaths in silence, cuts thru bones and makes waves through in infinite
= In silence the recognition of silence, Passes thru time eminates lightened silence
This state of stillness is in stillness, is there any stillness after this particular in stillness, any other dimension, any type of life?
Since child all these words, saint- sage- guru- wisdom-meditation- religion were inner taste of my being. My despair became sigh and cut thru my bone but with deep breaths it would bow a seed in silence, to flourish such results that my being acknowledged 26 years later.My deep thought longed for the journey but in everyday life was longing as a question in search of an answer, evolved in depression, seasons changed – years passed but seeds of my thought did not flourish. In deep death of despair desperation, I was gazing at my being and worldly affairs, then all of a sudden;
The seed began to flourish within the procedure of flourish seed. I gazed at the new-born Rose. Now this new being asked:
– Is religion only at sacred places?
= no !
– Does one can only find nectar at only sacred places?
– What is religion?
Who ever becomes self realized being, that being becomes saint and sage.
I became aware that my being became ignorant of such words. Then meditation began. My thought of 26 years were my meditation. These thoughts disappeared my anxiety-helplessness-despair-incapability and prisonment.
Then are these 26 years not comprising of ascetic?
Was this journey of self-realization, Was not Mantras?
-What was I before?
= only despair
-Then, What did I become?
= Ascetical being
-Who am I now?
=( what a question that being asks, Wow), but this being must answer.!!!—hhuuunnnnn—–!
Am I a learned being—-no!
Then, Am I not aware?—–not really
Then, Who am I ?
When I gaze at my being in deep sleep all I find is smiling physique.
Now I question Rose is knowledge important or meditation needed? Then Rose inner eye gives a quite and carefree smile. Then my being asks with inkling,
“what is enlightenment?”
( wonderstruck) Rose’s being is little disturbed by this amazing question? My being does not want to portray it in speech faculty. But still answers that I do not know what Krishna-Buddha—Jesus called Enlightenment?
All I know is this that my being’s womb engulfs this all creation, although I am serene in my on environment. In my deep thrust I still gaze at the smile which is within the lips—the free style action in my eyes—music in walking—dance in sitting and standing—and food became sacred. But my being still has longing to devour the creation.
Then this does not sound like silence?
Silence is desires-thoughts-battle and ‘me and mine’-‘you and yours’. This silence gives birth to awareness, with comes the changes in human being. This total awareness gazes at the creation. This silence becomes the death of Ego. In this dimension the being becomes totally art.
In other words:
Enlightenment is to recognize the emptiness in the sphere.
Now in other words:
When I-ness becomes nothingness that nothingness is within the I-ness, this experience of be experiencer, recognizes,realizes, feels, knows and accepts is enlightenment.
When the being becomes totally aware of inner being, until the being is in its physical being, the surrounding of such being would be independent—carefree—happy. This particular being’s life would not be recognized by human’s naked eye.
– Then, after the physical death of such being will there be life?
= for sure!
– Every spec of this creation must be enlightened, when total enlightenment takes place, the life will remain as is.
– So beings, is Krishna alive this moment?
= If any being in any shape or being has awareness and longing for Krishna, is Krishna.
– Then, who does not believe in Krishna?
= all human beings don’t believe in God.
– Who does not even know about Krishna?
= Does a being know itself?
Rose reply made the being capable of knowing bliss.
-Will the being ever take birth as Krishna?
= When the inner being experiences total awareness, in which Krishna consciousness is present; this presence will amalgamate within the awareness, the energy created in this procedure is Krishna.
– Then this state of creation is how long?
= This is infinite and boundless.
– The moral is this creation will never end?
= no !
– Then will this world end?
= yes, world is the creation, not the creator.
– Then, what is the point of Moksha?
= This is probably how an animal thinks about human beings
Rose walked away without gazing at my being, only sound was heard.
“One should only eat as much as can be digested”
Because my inner being was still thirsty for wisdom, because this is my journey to know my capacity. Rose’s total awareness and carefree emotion filled me with total pure love.
What should I name this!
What I saw today….
What should I say.
Who was seeing and what was being seen?
My being or the creation!
Then I realized,
I am the creation but ignorant…
In the vast deepness of my being for myself.
The eyelid opened to view the Nature…
There is neither denial nor the acceptance…
What ever is supposed to happen is happening…
the life forecasts ‘this is life’
I travel through a moment in a century so that a century can become a moment…
I deny so I can experience the acceptance
The time played game with a naughty smile which became a deep question,
“Who am I and what is time
If time exists then my being exists…
If there is no time, then there is no being.”
Then the creation answered,
“I am timeless, but I exist in time
I am shapeless, but take shape
I am the destiny, but become the path
I am but only I am, because I am formless.”
Then I saw only
In the womb of a moment
Taking birth of my being on the bed of death
I am infinite like the sky…
Empty, yet full…
I am nothing, but still very healthy-blissful-carefree
and the festival only.